Giving Feedback People Can Use

Warm-up0:00–0:088 min

Arrive and choose a situation

Set a respectful tone and pick a situation suitable for practice.

Try it

Name the change you hope to support

8 min

Give yourself 8 minutes for this activity. The timer only runs on this page.

Make a practice note

1
Choose a moment
Pick one recent action or interaction, not a broad judgment about a person.
2
Describe the observable detail
Write what you saw or heard, using words a camera or microphone could capture.
3
Set an intention
Finish: “I hope this conversation helps us…” Keep the goal focused on learning or a workable next step.

ReflectWhat makes this situation appropriate for practice, and what detail will you leave private?

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Concept0:08–0:2012 min

Build a clear feedback message

Use observable details, impact, and a specific request.

Read

Separate observation from interpretation

12 min

Try this sequence: “When [specific action] happened, [impact]. Could we [clear request] next time?” Then pause and ask, “How did you see it?” This is a flexible guide, not a script to recite.

For example: “When the report arrived after the review meeting, I had to make decisions without the latest figures. Could you send the draft by noon on review days? Is that workable?”

Knowledge checkWhich opening gives the other person the clearest, fairest information?A“You don’t care about deadlines.”B“You were late again and made everything difficult.”C“The draft arrived after the review began, so we had to decide without those figures.”D“Everyone thinks your updates are confusing.”

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Practice0:20–0:4020 min

Practise and revise

Draft a message, practise listening, and make the wording more useful.

Try it

Try the message, then improve it

20 min

Give yourself 20 minutes for this activity. The timer only runs on this page.

Practise in pairs or solo

1
Draft
Write one sentence each for the observation, impact, and request. Keep your example low-stakes.
2
Deliver
In pairs, take turns sharing the message in a calm, conversational tone. Working solo? Read it aloud and listen for blame or assumptions.
3
Listen
The listener responds as the recipient might: share context, ask a question, or say what feels clear. The speaker listens without interrupting.
4
Revise
Replace any label or absolute claim with a concrete detail. Make the request specific enough to act on and realistic enough to discuss.

ReflectWhich change made your message clearer or easier to hear?

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ReflectWhat did you learn by listening to the recipient’s perspective?

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Break0:40–0:455 min

Pause

Take a moment away from the exercise before the closing discussion.

Reflect

Reset before the debrief

5 min

Take a short pause. You can stretch, get water, or look over your revised message. Keep any personal examples private.

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Debrief0:45–1:0015 min

Debrief and plan a next step

Turn practice into a thoughtful plan for a real conversation.

Try it

Choose what to carry forward

15 min

Give yourself 15 minutes for this activity. The timer only runs on this page.

Make a conversation plan

1
Check the purpose
Write what you hope will improve. If the purpose is mainly to vent or punish, pause and reconsider the approach.
2
Choose the setting
Plan a private, suitable time. Ask whether the person is available for a brief conversation rather than surprising them in front of others.
3
Prepare the message
Note the observable behavior, its impact, and one realistic request. Leave room for the other person’s context.
4
Agree on follow-up
If useful, decide together when to check whether the agreed next step is working.

ReflectWhat is one phrase or listening habit you will use in your next feedback conversation?

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